great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
