non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Randomize
