Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
