These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
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