I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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