come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
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