Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
