um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Randomize