you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
