i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
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