I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
