I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
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