There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
