am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
