he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
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