Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Green mimosas i think yes
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
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