yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
