Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
you traded sex for a burrito?
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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