What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
You left your phone here
Wait...
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