guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Randomize
