i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
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