how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
you never un-have a 4some
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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