Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize