wanna go halves on a baby?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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