Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
