Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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