Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize