she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
