whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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