I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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