i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Randomize
