I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
