the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I can't turn off my feet"
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
