he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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