What did we do last night that was yellow?
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
