What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Well I just put wine in my tea
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
