Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
