quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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