i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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