That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize