guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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