Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
