I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
