What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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