carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
as a side note pls kill me
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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