Quick, to the slutcave!
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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