Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
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