I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
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