I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
