True but thats because hes a fetus.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
