Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
A+ Viking dick
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
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long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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